Saturday, February 21

That bothers me sometimes, she is just too jealous of any other girl I know ... She just wants me to be all hers...
I assumed that this meant that she was supposed to consider herself all mine........ Too.
[what?]

***

I waited for her, we were supposed to start chatting online at 9:00 Amman time ... I waited and waited for so long ... Then I waited more. My internet account was over, and the line was disconnected... It was 1:30am Baghdad time and still, she weren't home yet.
I called her, she picks up the phone laughing ... Answering with a happy tone ... She just went out of the cinema with her friends .. It appeared that 'her friends' referred to 'him'... Together they went to see the same romance movie that she and I went to see it when I was there with her. I heard him making fun on the way she looks and she was telling him to stop it with a come-and-get-me tone ... I smelt his perfume all over her... I felt his hands around her body... Was I upset ? I Don't know.
I finished the phone call, told her that I'm going to bed because I was too tired to talk, she agrees, simply agrees.
I lied in bed .... I was confused and thinking...I had nothing to do but thinking.
she calls, its 2:30 in the morning, she must have been back home by now... I reject her call. She calls again, and again ... She keeps calling, 10 or 12 times. No .. It was 12 ,I'm sure .... Then I decide to pick it up next time, she stops calling.
I'm back to my confused position.
3:30 in the morning, I'm still awake.... Thinking, was I confused ? No.
3:45 ... It was the last time I saw the weird looking clock in my bed-room.
I woke up at 11:00 ... Headache is filling my over-thinking head as usual, hate was in my heart... That's new.
that was all.
was that a nightmare ? Maybe.
what is for sure is that now I hate myself more.

Peace? Not anymore.